Because I'm pushing 40 and God's probably ready to start putting me in my grave by now.
(He's pushed his luck way too many times in the past and he's certain that was running out. It would be fitting if he just winds up dying on the toilet. Ultimate punchline.)
Everything sucks way more at this age.
(A cautionary tale by Richie Tozier.
He hesitantly picks at the stirfry, grabbing a green pepper, sighing. It wasn't even going to go that well with anything else. But whatever. He pops it into his mouth and chomps on it.)
I'm an adventurous dude, what can I say. (He also hated himself but that joke was a lot less funny. He snorts.)
And you haven't seen a perfectly good hoagie that fell on the street you just saw a rat run by on. Somethings are worth the risk.
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(He's pushed his luck way too many times in the past and he's certain that was running out. It would be fitting if he just winds up dying on the toilet. Ultimate punchline.)
Everything sucks way more at this age.
(A cautionary tale by Richie Tozier.
He hesitantly picks at the stirfry, grabbing a green pepper, sighing. It wasn't even going to go that well with anything else. But whatever. He pops it into his mouth and chomps on it.)
I'm an adventurous dude, what can I say. (He also hated himself but that joke was a lot less funny. He snorts.)
And you haven't seen a perfectly good hoagie that fell on the street you just saw a rat run by on. Somethings are worth the risk.